Noticing what we need

We can be quite good at noticing what other people need. We know when someone needs a break, when they're hungry, when something is bothering them or when they could do with a little help. Yet how often do we notice what we need ourselves?

I’m curious about what happens when we become so used to looking after everything around us that we stop checking in with ourselves.

When we know what everyone else needs

We might notice that someone is tired and suggest they go to bed. We might see that a friend needs someone to talk to, or know that a family member has had a difficult day. We can become very familiar with looking out for other people.

Sometimes we do it without even thinking.

When we don't notice ourselves

Our own needs can be much harder to see.

We might be tired but keep going. Feel hungry but wait until we've finished everything else. Need some time alone but carry on being available to everyone.

Sometimes we don't even realise what we need until we've gone too far.

When we finally stop

It can be surprising what we notice when we slow down for a moment.

Perhaps we're more tired than we thought. Perhaps something has been bothering us. Perhaps we simply need some quiet.

We don't always need to do anything about it straight away.

Sometimes it helps just to notice.

Making room for ourselves

Noticing what we need doesn't mean putting ourselves before everyone else. There will always be things that need doing and people we care about, but we are part of our own lives too.

Perhaps we can give ourselves the same attention we so easily give to other people.

A moment to ask: How am I doing? What do I need right now?

We may not always have an answer, but perhaps asking the question is a way of remembering ourselves.

I wonder what you might notice the next time you stop and ask yourself what you need.